Holiday Stresses:
How to Not Get Overwhelmed and Actually Enjoy the Season

by Maureen R. Johnston, MFT
(Originally appeared in my online newsletter Sense and Psychotherapy, December 2010)

Shortly after Halloween, I became aware of a growing sense of excitement in my clients and others around me about the rapidly approaching holiday season. Now with Thanksgiving behind us and December well on it's way, I'm noticing that for many of us, while the excitement is still there, it is often accompanied by feelings of anxiety, sadness, anger, and/or disgust, as well as high levels of stress.

All the normal, typical stress-inducing aspects of the holiday season are exacerbated when money is tight, we're worried about our jobs, stores have closed, offices and houses stand vacant, and teachers are loading down their students with big projects, exams, and long papers.

But not everyone I meet is in a funk, so I began to look more closely at what those who are in good spirits are doing differently than those of us who are not holding up so well. Some commonalities have emerged and I'd like to share what I'm seeing in the form of suggestions on how to not get overwhelmed this holiday season.

A Few Tips...

• Focus on what you do have to be grateful for. Research shows that grateful people report higher levels of positive emotions, life satisfaction, vitality, optimism and lower levels of depression and stress.
   
• Know and honor your own limits. Whether this is in terms of alcohol, food, money, work, socializing, and/or energy level — pay attention to how much is good for you to take in and give out.
   
• Take time to re-evaluate your priorities — what are the most important aspects of the holidays for you? There are plenty of websites offering tips on how to spend less by making your gifts or entertaining more simply.
   
• Schedule in physical activity — exercise is one of the first things we drop when we get busy and overwhelmed, yet one of the best stress-reduction tools known. So, even if it's only 15 minutes worth of walking or stretching, squeeze it in.
   
• Examine your expectations — are they realistic or are you setting yourself up for disappointments? Don't expect a Norman Rockwell experience with a Homer Simpson family.
   
• Keep in mind that this is a very stressful time for many people for a lot of reasons, and that if it becomes overwhelming, not only is it OK to reach out for help, it is the healthy thing to do.

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